Tips For Life 1-10

if you want to learn & laugh. then you MUST READ THIS!!!!
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I am going to write tips to help you all in life.

Tip 1) Dont run with scissors.

Why: You could stab yourself in the eye and need special eye surgery.

Tip 2) Dont quit, Get fired.

Why: If you get fired, they will have to pay you for the entire week.

Tip 3) Dont wear a helmet.

Why: You will get helmet hair.

Tip 4) The pen is NOT mightier than the sword.

Why: If you fight a dude who has a sword and you got a pen, you will lose cause they will chop your head clean off of your shoulders.

Tip 5) When dating a fat chick, bring mini-sized Snickers along with you.

Why: If they get mad at you, give them one of the Snickers and they will be happy again. (but bring ALOT with you)

Tip 6) Dont play in traffic.

Why: Rude people in cars will honk at you and ruin your fun.

Tip 7) The gamer wont play the Wii

Why: The Wii Sucks!

Tip 8) Dont get in a fight with a bunch of squirrels.

Why: They are a bunch of dirty cheating BASTARDS!!! (trust me, i know)

Tip 9) When getting a boob job, dont make them to big.

Why: Fake boobs dont float. So if you get thrown off a boat with some big fake tits, you will drown.

Tip 10) Take a crap everyday.

Why: If you dont take a shit and then try to push it out, you could die! (ITS TRUE!!!)